Things I Would Tweet

I used to have a Twitter account. Well, I still do, but it’s just used to let you all know when I wrote a blog post. Almost none of my real-life friends were on it and those who were, they post to Facebook more often. And, well, I only have so much time everyday to check social media and can barely keep up with Instagram – where I mostly follow strangers who make pretty things – and Facebook – where I’ve got friends/family plus a random sampling of companies/causes/organizations I follow. I’d get to the end of a day, have time to check Twitter, and have 100s of tweets I’d missed and, despite the short character limit, it was daunting. So, yeah, Twitter isn’t (wasn’t?) for me.

That said, I have had a lot of thoughts lately which would be well-suited for tweets, if I ever were to actually tweet again. I decided to start tracking these throughout the day. (And, before you start reading, I know it’s like I’m channeling Jenny Lawson. It’s because I’m listening to her audiobook right now, so my internal voice sounds like her right now. It happens when I get overexposed to one person’s voice and/or writing. It’ll be over, soon enough, and I’ll be back to writing like me.)

Anyway, here’s what I recorded over a 48 hour period worth of collecting Twitter-style thoughts (well, collected the subjects, just wrote them up into tweet here):

  • I think I just had the adult version of Bagel Bites for lunch. Next time, I’m just going to buy those and skip the fancy organic version.
  • This guy’s hair reminds me of Beiber, but he’s in his 50s so it’s both funny and awesome that he can do that with his hair.
  • Just watched the episode of Ally McBeal where she picks a personal theme song. Couldn’t think of one for myself besides “I’m a little teapot.”
  • My ballet teacher is trying to kill me. New routines each week after I didn’t even learn the ones last week. At least I know it’s a good workout and the new stuff makes the time go by really fast.
  • Gel nail polish is really nice and shiny. But it’s too easy to peel off when you get bored on a conference call. (But does come all the way off in big pieces.)
  • Loving listening to audiobooks on my commute, though it does make me want to stay in the car longer after I arrive somewhere. Wish there was a well to tell where you are in a given chapter in the Overdrive app.
  • Lizzie doesn’t like the cowl I started for her. “No holes.” Searching for a textured pattern now. Any suggestions? Have looked at Rav search far too many times.
  • Why does the rec center have so few drawing/painting classes outside of normal work hours? People with jobs want to be creative, too.
  • May not do ballet next term but try Bollywood or bellydance. Matt laughed more at these possibilities than when I first signed up for ballet at Mason.
  • Work goals for 2017 include mentoring a junior engineer. Harder than you’d think, mostly because I’m about the most junior person in my entire group.
  • Used the word “awesomesauce” with an important customer today. Thankfully, he laughed and didn’t (just) think I’m totally weird.
  • I cannot wave in a way that is not totally awkward. Like a giddy fourth grader who just saw her crush.
  • Where did the names “stockinette” and “garter” come from, anyway?
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Things I Would Tweet

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